03 Apr The Kiss & The Kick of The Female Friendship
There’s nothing worse than girls.
I was told that many a time after becoming a mother to one.
If they meant worse than boys, I think that’s a little vague and unfair.
They are different beasts entirely, don’t get me wrong but I’m sure that boys come with their own foibles too.
Girls have to be handled like the most delicate glass vase you have ever handled – beautiful yet fragile.
My eldest vase is fragile at the moment.
It was parents evening last week and she had already pre-warned me that Miss Lloyd will ‘probably’ mention that she is a chatterbox and sometimes gets told off for not zipping it when asked.
This didn’t surprise me.
When a whole class erupts I can imagine that she would be the one unable to stuff the laughter back in the can long after teach has given the death glare.
The appointment really kicked me in the emotional dick.
Niamh is working at ‘greater depth’ with her school work – we got this out the way first.
This isn’t me being braggy – ok well maybe a little but i’m shallow and I also take pride in the fact that what i’m putting in is making a difference.
She works hard and enjoys school work.
She loves to learn and this is why I love working in a class of this age group.
Life hasn’t got to them yet.
It isn’t quite cool to be the class clown or to be disruptive and it’s not yet geeky to throw your hand up to a question like the ants in your pants are nipping at your bum.
School work out the way though, she had been concerned about Niamh and her ability to fit into a group of girls.
Last year there was only her and her BFF forever until she dies in a class of boys and this was heaven for her.
This year there are lots more girls and her BFF forever until she dies is doing the very normal thing of making more friends and wanting to play with other people.
She is taking this really hard, as a personal rejection almost and is becoming a little withdrawn in class.
Apparently in the playground she has opted for chasing and catching the boys instead of trying to integrate with the girls.
She is handling it by being quite clingy with her BFFUSD and bickering a lot with her perhaps in order to regain some attention, albeit the wrong way.
Her teacher had noticed that the whole situation is making her tics increase in class, clearing her throat being the big one and it’s only a matter of time before classmates start to mention it to her.
I feel so sad for her.
Mainly because you want your children to be made up of the best parts of yourself.
Don’t get me wrong, the passion with which she wrote her ‘mills & Boon-esque’ novel about boyfriend Sonny had me beaming with semi-concerned pride but sadly, everything that I see as a weakness in myself, I seem to have passed on to her.
I cringe in a group of girls.
I never feel like I have anything of value to add to a group situation.
I smart a little when my friends get other friends and seem to prefer their company.
Why couldn’t she have had Neil’s confidence?
He was the life and soul of our office back in the day.
I hate to see her wringing her hands when she’s uncomfortable or ticking when anxious.
Why should a 7 year old even have to feel those feelings?
She has all her life to be scared of the world like I am.
It is the absolute pits to feel as though I have handed her the anxiety baton and forced her to run with it knowing full well it is a race without a finish line.